This is so not what I was going to blog about today. But after a mediocre weekend and Monday, this is what I've got...
After work tonight, I went to the craft store. I've been looking for days for some little award-type statues for a staff appreciation "Awards Ceremony" we are having at work to honor our administrative staff. Like the Oscars.
After wandering the craft store for almost an hour and loading up my cart with stuff I didn't need but couldn't resist, I decided I'd MAKE little awards. I'm crafty, I can do it!
So, I bought small, solid, wooden, square boxes and some wooden star shapes. And primer spray paint. And gold spray paint.
Well, the weather is a-changing, and, unlike some of my other projects that I can do outdoors or with the back door open, this wasn't one of them. It's far too windy to do it outside. So, I set up a cardboard box in the basement with newspaper, and pried open one of the basement windows that doesn't really open (and prayed that a dead rodent of some sort didn't fall out - and none did, but some leaves fell out and scared me. And some dirts and stuff).
I was proud of myself for remembering to change my clothes - so there I was in just my undies and a t-shirt and I started a-sprayin'. I pulled the shirt up over my nose to keep from priming my nostrils, and kept walking away so I wasn't inhaling too much. After 10 little boxes and 10 little stars, I got the munchies and went and ate some leftover pizza. And I read the paper while I was eating. Even though I know the spray paint killed some brain cells, I FEEL smarter. Everything seems much clearer when you're altered.
Then I went back for the golden coat. This krylon gold is awesome! Soon everything was shiny and gleaming gold. The inside of the box was so beautiful, so shiny. In an effort to hurry up and finish, I started doing some of the boxes by holding them. In a few minutes, my entire hand looked like it had been dipped in 14 kt. gold. It was really cool looking. And I started singing. I started singing, "Goldfingerrrrrr!!!"
I did get a smidge of gold paint on the washing machine (which is where I was drying the stuff). Hopefully no one will notice.
The primer washed off with soap and water easily. Silly me, I thought the gold would be the same way. Well, it wasn't. But, after breathing in the fumes for an hour, I didn't care.
Mmmm, no paint thinner. I know what will work! Nail polish remover. Great, there's only about 1/8 of a bottle left.
I scrubbed and scrubbed. I think I got the paint off more by taking off a layer of skin than the nail polish remover.
By now, I've got a great buzzing sensation. And I'm not sure if it's from the spray paint or the nail polish remover. Everything smells so great. Did I mention that this blanket in the computer room is SOOOO soft, it's like I'm wrapped up in warm butter. Soft, warm, velvety butter...
And, for the first time ever, that show 24 actually seems interesting. No, not really.
Oh, and there's another story. My husband started working at a new location of the retail establishment he works for. They built this place on a landfill. Sing it with me: "We built this city... we built this city on a landfiiiillllllll!" So, inside each of the stores, there is a methane vent to vent off any methane that might be seeping in. Every day, a human being comes and checks the methane levels. If it's too high, they have to evacuate.
A Fashion Bug just opened nearby, and I wanted to get some pants for the China trip, so we went there for a quick trip. I'm in the fitting rooms trying something on, and this high pitched alarm starts blaring. So, I came out (don't worry, I put my clothes back on), and I said, "Is that the methane alarm?" And the girl working there said, "Yes. We have to leave the building and wait for the fire department." We left all my stuff on the counter and went outside. Then I asked if they could save my stuff and my husband could get it tomorrow. So that's what they'll do. But isn't that weird that we had to evacuate the building because of the methane alarm? I asked my husband if he farted in there. I think people need to be careful about farting in there with that methane alarm so sensitive.
Wow, I sure used the word "so" a lot.
Oh my gosh, I just thought of a kick-ass band name! "Acid Tone!" Is that cool, or what??? I came up with that because I can still smell the acetone on my hands, so I was sitting here thinking in my head, "ASSSSSSitone..." See the thought pattern there?
I just wish I could have taken a picture of my golden hand. It was awesome! I'm sure it's going to alter my DNA somehow, tiny golden goodness molecules coursing through my pores and into my bloodstream. Golden blood! Not to mention my galvanized lungs.
Just call me Sister Golden Hand Surprise! Hey, it's better than golden showers...
